Long Distance Relationships...Iono.

It takes a lot of patience and determination to be able to engage in a long distance relationship (henceforward LDR). I can't say that I have ever truly been in one. Sure I've entertained katz that lived in other states but upon realizing that neither of us were willing to uproot ourselves or do the traveling that is required to keep such a relationship going, the connection just dwindled into an internet friendship. But as I sit back and observe others whom are engaging in them I can't help but wonder...is it me?

I do not require much in my potential mate. Well maybe I do... A good 'career' or at least aspirations towards those ends, stimulating conversation, charisma, self and world awareness to name a few. My superficial side does require one to be attractive and well kept but what about those other things that most if not all relationships require? Those moments of staring at each other as if nothing or no one else even matters. Walking down the street just enjoying each others company, laughing at the stupid shit each other says or if either of us trips slightly on a crack in the sidewalk. Lest I forget the sex to be had on a whim. Feeling that persons breathe on the back of my neck as we drift to sleep. Waking them up to a cheese omlet, fresh home fries, bacon, biscuts w/butter and some apple sauce just to nourish my dude for a morning romp. Could I forgo all of this for weeks on end; countless cancelations that may be encountered? Rotational visits to each others homes just for a weekend we both wish would never end? I just can't imagine it.

Watching two friends engage in these LDR have caused me to question my stance against them. One whom met his bf over the internet is now in marital bliss since dude moved up here is a success story for the ages. They are inseparable. Definitely a sight to behold. The second individual whom met his interest on a social trip is just beginning his and although finding it difficult as I would imagine would be at first, is willing to engage in it with hopes that the desired outcome will lead to lasting love. In his case, dude has decided to uproot himself and move to NYC...eventually. All I can do is sit back and say wow. I wish them all the luck and well wishes in the world.

I posed this question to myself... Could Damnit! do it? The saying goes there is someone for everybody. Could my someone be 'somewhere' else and by being closed minded (stubborn I guess is the word some people call me...among others never uttered) to the experience and or challenge, I am consciously dooming myself to a world filled with celebrity sports figures running across my screen or porn stars gallivanting from clip to clip on my favorites list? What if I could humble myself to the possibilities of LDL (Long Distant Love)? Hell, it's not like my short distant love affairs have panned out as I've desired. What if I would allow myself to hop on a plane to see that 'ONE' that for those brief moments in time will seem like eternity? I mean, what if...? What...if? Iono...

Damnit!

Betrayal!

How do you handle it...? I'm not a vindictive person but sometimes I feel like getting even is necessary! I think Imma pray and go to sleep.

~Damnit!