In My Lifetime: Vol II

Not much to say...

2009-08-30T06:36:00.000-07:00

So yea I've been gone for a good lil while but there's a perfectly good explanation for that. Ain't shit really going on (excuse my french). I mean eh, I'm pretty much back into the swing of things at work. Job is going great so far. Much more responsibility than I've ever had in past positions which is a great thing. So that's a bright spot.

My personal life is well, at this point non existant. Not tryna dwell on it na mean. It is what it is.

So another good thing about being back on my grind professionally is that I now have the income to fund some of the extracurricular activities I was accustomed to one of which being the gym. If ya'll remember most of last year I spent tryna get my body together to unveil this summer. Unfortunately stress from my previous job (Read: pergatory) and the subsequent parting of ways made it difficult to maintain what I had worked for. Although I am not fat or obese I clearly am not pleased wit my lil stomach. Further, others recently made comments about the tum tum that kinda cut like a knife. Having said all that I am back in the gym and I have been consulting all of my gym-o-holics as to what I should do to chisel out this temple of mines. So far the consensus has been that it's not the exercises or my diet, but it is my determination and work ethic. Yea my brain wants it, but the motivation to do it needs to surface. I agree. Oy vey...to be a cartoon character where someone can just come and paint a nice body on ya lol. Anyway, I'm fitna get up and head to the gym as we speak. Wish me luck folks.

Ummm nothing else to say besides that. I'll be in Atlanta next weekend so (if anyone actually still reads this) for those of you whom reside down there keep ya eyes open for tha kid. I'll holla!

~Damnit!

Just a few things...

2009-07-02T18:36:00.000-07:00

Yo watz good blog fam. Just a couple things you may not have known about me...

- I'm very head strong (well yea you knew that)
- I love my country (God bless the USA)
- I've been unemployeed for the last 4 months
- Just got a new job that I'm excited to start in 2 wks. Wish me luck.
- I am dating this amazing dude n although he's not ready for a relationship we may end up together
- I've been bored n lonely but eh such is life.
- My boy Mr. Jones is one of my best friends and I adore him!
- I am extremely loyal to my peeps no matter what

So those are some things that you may have not gathered from reading my blogs. Love you all and I will try to be more diligent in updating this shit.

~Damnit!

Fascinating Article: American Thinker 6/25/09

2009-06-26T11:13:00.000-07:00

I would be remiss if I did not share with you all an article that I read today on the AmericanThinker.com by L.E. Ikenga. It's extremely well written and is quite insightful. Take a moment to read below.

June 25, 2009

Obama, the African Colonial By L.E. Ikenga

Had Americans been able to stop obsessing over the color of Barack Obama's skin and instead paid more attention to his cultural identity, maybe he would not be in the White House today. The key to understanding him lies with his identification with his father, and his adoption of a cultural and political mindset rooted in postcolonial Africa.

Like many educated intellectuals in postcolonial Africa, Barack Hussein Obama, Sr. was enraged at the transformation of his native land by its colonial conqueror. But instead of embracing the traditional values of his own tribal cultural past, he embraced an imported Western ideology, Marxism. I call such frustrated and angry modern Africans who embrace various foreign "isms", instead of looking homeward for repair of societies that are broken, African Colonials. They are Africans who serve foreign ideas.

The tropes of America's racial history as a way of understanding all things black are useless in understanding the man who got his dreams from his father, a Kenyan exemplar of the African Colonial.

Before I continue, I need to say this: I am a first generation born West African-American woman whose parents emigrated to the U.S. in the 1970's from the country now called Nigeria. I travel to Nigeria frequently. I see myself as both a proud American and as a proud Igbo (the tribe that we come from -- also sometimes spelled Ibo). Politically, I have always been conservative (though it took this past election for me to commit to this once and for all!); my conservative values come from my Igbo heritage and my place of birth. Of course, none of this qualifies me to say what I am about to -- but at the same time it does.

My friends, despite what CNN and the rest are telling you, Barack Obama is nothing more than an old school African Colonial who is on his way to turning this country into one of the developing nations that you learn about on the National Geographic Channel. Many conservative (East, West, South, North) African-Americans like myself -- those of us who know our history -- have seen this movie before. Here are two main reasons why many Americans allowed Obama to slip through the cracks despite all of his glaring inconsistencies:

First, Obama has been living on American soil for most of his adult life. Therefore, he has been able to masquerade as one who understands and believes in American democratic ideals. But he does not. Barack Obama is intrinsically undemocratic and as his presidency plays out, this will become more obvious. Second, and most importantly, too many Americans know very little about Africa. The one-size-fits-all understanding that many Americans (both black and white) continue to have of Africa might end up bringing dire consequences for this country.

Contrary to the way it continues to be portrayed in mainstream Western culture, Africa is not a continent that can be solely defined by AIDS, ethnic rivalries, poverty and safaris. Africa, like any other continent, has an immense history defined by much diversity and complexity. Africa's long-standing relationship with Europe speaks especially to some of these complexities -- particularly the relationship that has existed between the two continents over the past two centuries. Europe's complete colonization of Africa during the nineteenth century, also known as the Scramble for Africa, produced many unfortunate consequences, the African colonial being one of them.

The African colonial (AC) is a person who by means of their birth or lineage has a direct connection with Africa. However, unlike Africans like me, their worldviews have been largely shaped not by the indigenous beliefs of a specific African tribe but by the ideals of the European imperialism that overwhelmed and dominated Africa during the colonial period. AC's have no real regard for their specific African traditions or histories. AC's use aspects of their African culture as one would use pieces of costume jewelry: things of little or no value that can be thoughtlessly discarded when they become a negative distraction, or used on a whim to decorate oneself in order to seem exotic. (Hint: Obama's Muslim heritage).

On the other hand, AC's strive to be the best at the culture that they inherited from Europe. Throughout the West, they are tops in their professions as lawyers, doctors, engineers, Ivy League professors and business moguls; this is all well and good. It's when they decide to engage us as politicians that things become messy and convoluted.

The African colonial politician (ACP) feigns repulsion towards the hegemonic paradigms of Western civilization. But at the same time, he is completely enamored of the trappings of its aristocracy or elite culture. The ACP blames and caricatures whitey to no end for all that has gone wrong in the world. He convinces the masses that various forms of African socialism are the best way for redressing the problems that European colonialism motivated in Africa. However, as opposed to really being a hard-core African Leftist who actually believes in something, the ACP uses socialist themes as a way to disguise his true ambitions: a complete power grab whereby the "will of the people" becomes completely irrelevant.

Barack Obama is all of the above. The only difference is that he is here playing (colonial) African politics as usual.

In his 1995 memoir, Dreams From My Father -- an eloquent piece of political propaganda -- Obama styles himself as a misunderstood intellectual who is deeply affected by the sufferings of black people, especially in America and Africa. In the book, Obama clearly sees himself as an African, not as a black American. And to prove this, he goes on a quest to understand his Kenyan roots. He is extremely thoughtful of his deceased father's legacy; this provides the main clue for understanding Barack Obama.

Barack Obama Sr. was an African colonial to the core; in his case, the apple did not fall far from the tree. All of the telltale signs of Obama's African colonialist attitudes are on full display in the book -- from his feigned antipathy towards Europeans to his view of African tribal associations as distracting elements that get in the way of "progress". (On p. 308 of Dreams From My Father, Obama says that African tribes should be viewed as an "ancient loyalties".)

Like imperialists of Old World Europe, the ACP sees their constituents not as free thinking individuals who best know how to go about achieving and creating their own means for success. Instead, the ACP sees his constituents as a flock of ignorant sheep that need to be led -- oftentimes to their own slaughter.

Like the European imperialist who spawned him, the ACP is a destroyer of all forms of democracy.

Here are a few examples of what the British did in order to create (in 1914) what is now called Nigeria and what Obama is doing to you:

1. Convince the people that "clinging" to any aspect of their cultural (tribal) identity or history is bad and regresses the process of "unity". British Imperialists deeply feared people who were loyal to anything other than the state. "Tribalism" made the imperialists have to work harder to get people to just fall in line. Imperialists pitted tribes against each other in order to create chaos that they then blamed on ethnic rivalry. Today many "educated" Nigerians, having believed that their traditions were irrelevant, remain completely ignorant of their ancestry and the history of their own tribes.

2. Confiscate the wealth and resources of the area that you govern by any means necessary in order to redistribute wealth. The British used this tactic to present themselves as empathetic and benevolent leaders who wanted everyone to have a "fair shake". Imperialists are not interested in equality for all. They are interested in controlling all.

3. Convince the masses that your upper-crust university education naturally puts you on an intellectual plane from which to understand everything even when you understand nothing. Imperialists were able to convince the people that their elite university educations allowed them to understand what Africa needed. Many of today's Nigerians-having followed that lead-hold all sorts of degrees and certificates-but what good are they if you can't find a job?

4. Lie to the people and tell them that progress is being made even though things are clearly becoming worse. One thing that the British forgot to mention to their Nigerian constituents was that one day, the resources that were being used to engineer "progress" (which the British had confiscated from the Africans to begin with!) would eventually run out. After WWII, Western Europe could no longer afford to hold on to their African colonies. So all of the counterfeit countries that the Europeans created were then left high-and-dry to fend for themselves. This was the main reason behind the African independence movements of the1950 and 60's. What will a post-Obama America look like?

5. Use every available media outlet to perpetuate the belief that you and your followers are the enlightened ones-and that those who refuse to support you are just barbaric, uncivilized, ignorant curmudgeons. This speaks for itself.

America, don't be fooled. The Igbos were once made up of a confederacy of clans that ascribed to various forms of democratic government. They took their eyes off the ball and before they knew it, the British were upon them. Also, understand this: the African colonial who is given too much political power can only become one thing: a despot.

**END**

~Damnit!

Congratz to my team.. The LA Lakers!!!!

2009-06-18T09:17:00.000-07:00

Congratz to the LA Lakers for an outstanding season. Oh and before any of ya'll try to come at me saying that I'm not a true fan, know that I've been a LA fan since Kareem n Magic, thanks!

~Damnit!

NYC Fleet Week 2009

2009-05-22T13:08:00.000-07:00

So yesterday I decided to get out and enjoy the beautiful weather up here in the NYC metropolitian area and what better time then Fleet Week. No not that kinda 'fleet' get your mind out the gutter guys n dolls. Fleet Week is a week long celebration leading up to memorial day which kicks off with the Parade of Ships into New York City Harbor. A stunning sight! On yesterday I went to Central Park to partake in Marine Day and below are some photo's I took.

Some band that was playin some kind of music lol

Take a look at these guns. Bang Bang!!!

I think they wanted her to hold 'it'. LoL.

Some of the gear some of our men n women in uniform wear.

Ya can't really see it but this camera man was sexy as all hell! LoL.

Here's some of the moves I learned

So if you come across a soldier this Memorial Day Weekend, extend a hand and thank them for their service and sacrifice to our great nation. God Bless!

damn Damn DAMNIT, I DONE DID IT!!!

2009-05-19T15:06:00.000-07:00

Aiight so I have succumb to the pressure of everyone around me joining this twitter thing. I tried to stand against the onslaught of individuals telling me that I am out of touch, old and not 'hip' (for lack of a better word) but to no avail. So the young kharismatic kat who has neither MySpace or Facebook has embarked upon a new venture. Yes folks ya boy ~Damnit! is now on twitter.

https://twitter.com/Blaq_Majik

Come follow me and see the crazy shyt that only ~Damnit! can say from time to time. LoL.

~Damnit!

Mini Series II: FLLLYYY ME TO THA MOON...Or NYC

2009-04-28T12:43:00.001-07:00

Ok, why in the world would some IDIOT authorize this photo-op fly over in Manhattan. I just don't get it. LoL. New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg called the flights "ridiculous and poor judgement" but I could go further. This administration official, this Louis Caldera is a retarded lil twit that should be plucked from his office like the little tick he is. I mean look at the panic his poor decision caused...

Now, for my lil buddy YB&DL who seems to think that I walk lock step with Republicans on everything from abortion to drinking water, this may come as a shock to him. I truely don't think that OB had anything to do with this lil fly over photo-op shit for one reason. He's far too calculating and methodical and this 'mission' was far too sloppy and retarded to be approved by him. Although Sean Hanity alluded that OB was fully aware of the 'mission' (I keep putting that in quotes because it's laughable to call this a 'mission'. You wasted Jet fuel for a picture that could've easily been photo shopped by a 6th grader! Yet I MUST cut MY carbon footprint to stop Global Warming??? Riiiiiiiiiiiight...LoL), I don't agree. There, I said it. LoL.

**UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE**

While watching the evening news, it's reported that the cost of this lil photo-op that unnerved so many here in the NYC metropolitian area was... *Drumroll* $56,508 per hour. LoL amazing!

~Damnit!

Mini Series: He 2 We...

2009-04-27T01:50:00.000-07:00

Exudes confidence without uttering a single breathe

Magnificantly made tho not ashamed of the imperfections lurking within his depths

Takes every opportunity to attune himself with ones wants and desires

Is convinced that your happiness ignites his inner fire

Manages to make time for you through impossible odds

Enjoys the company cause with you he doesn't have to prod

Alone is many things, one of the best you've ever seen

Accepts that he is imperfect, but would be better with...

Fiercely loyal for I know his heart is true

Assured, not conceited and he welcomes that through n through

Catering to him appears to be all I want to do

Yet he adores my independence

One of many things he's drawn to

Apparent are my flaws to him, no he is not aloof

For I realized long ago truth is far more attractive than spoof

A man in my own right, successful yes indeed

Still certain I am, that he n me would produce an unsurpassed...

Form a magical unity many have never seen

If life were the Olympics, combined we are a Dream Team

A force to be reckoned with but please don't be deceived

For alone we're a handful, but united we are stronger than anything you could perceive

As sure as the sun rises n sets from east to west

Our bond will remain strong forever at best

We've steadily progressed transgressing he n me

Yes THIS is the story of how He became We

~Damnit!

I ALSO challenge YOU!!

2009-03-30T11:21:00.000-07:00

I was perusing online some of the more popular papers around the country and came across this OP-ED in the LA Times. Made me chuckle because I issued the same challenge to YB&DL a couple post back in response to a comment he made. Eh, well now it seems that the challenge has been issued to the public via Op-ed by a Andrew Klavan. Hence, as bloggers seemingly ONLY Black gay Conservative Republican I give you the following link. Cheers!

http://www.latimes.com/news/opinion/commentary/la-oe-klavan29-2009mar29,0,5456892.story

~Damnit!

What If...

2009-03-15T10:49:00.000-07:00

- I never spoke but you knew I was there...

- I always expressed that I actually cared...

- I didn't have a mind of my own and I just followed the crowd...

- I didn't smoke so many blaq~n~milds...

- I always agreed with everything you said n did...

- I continuously made bad decisions like I were a pre-pubescent kid...

- My mother n I didn't argue as much as we do...

- I thought less about me, n so much more about you...

- My happiness was in the hands of others...

- I sometimes didn't feel so GOT DAMN smothered...

- I sat quietly, wondering about what everyone did...

- I never experienced the things I did when I was that short lil kid...

- I knew the decisions I made would transform me into the man I am today...

- All these thoughts where w/held inside for another day...

~Damnit!

The 2% Illusion - Wall Street Journal February 26th, 2009

2009-03-04T09:15:00.000-08:00

There was an article in the Wall Street Journal (my favorite paper btw) on the date mentioned above that I found very interesting and I'd like to share with you all. Enjoy!

THE 2% ILLUSION

President Obama has laid out the most ambitious and expensive domestic agenda since LBJ, and now all he has to do is figure out how to pay for it. On Tuesday, he left the impression that we need merely end "tax breaks for the wealthiest 2% of Americans," and he promised that households earning less than $250,000 won't see their taxes increased by "one single dime." AP This is going to be some trick. Even the most basic inspection of the IRS income tax statistics shows that raising taxes on the salaries, dividends and capital gains of those making more than $250,000 can't possibly raise enough revenue to fund Mr. Obama's new spending ambitions.Consider the IRS data for 2006, the most recent year that such tax data are available and a good year for the economy and "the wealthiest 2%." Roughly 3.8 million filers had adjusted gross incomes above $200,000 in 2006. (That's about 7% of all returns; the data aren't broken down at the $250,000 point.) These people paid about $522 billion in income taxes, or roughly 62% of all federal individual income receipts. The richest 1% -- about 1.65 million filers making above $388,806 -- paid some $408 billion, or 39.9% of all income tax revenues, while earning about 22% of all reported U.S. income.Note that federal income taxes are already "progressive" with a 35% top marginal rate, and that Mr. Obama is (so far) proposing to raise it only to 39.6%, plus another two percentage points in hidden deduction phase-outs. He'd also raise capital gains and dividend rates, but those both yield far less revenue than the income tax. These combined increases won't come close to raising the hundreds of billions of dollars in revenue that Mr. Obama is going to need. But let's not stop at a 42% top rate; as a thought experiment, let's go all the way. A tax policy that confiscated 100% of the taxable income of everyone in America earning over $500,000 in 2006 would only have given Congress an extra $1.3 trillion in revenue. That's less than half the 2006 federal budget of $2.7 trillion and looks tiny compared to the more than $4 trillion Congress will spend in fiscal 2010. Even taking every taxable "dime" of everyone earning more than $75,000 in 2006 would have barely yielded enough to cover that $4 trillion.Fast forward to this year (and 2010) when the Wall Street meltdown and recession are going to mean far few taxpayers earning more than $500,000. Profits are plunging, businesses are cutting or eliminating dividends, hedge funds are rolling up, and, most of all, capital nationwide is on strike. Raising taxes now will thus yield far less revenue than it would have in 2006. Mr. Obama is of course counting on an economic recovery. And he's also assuming along with the new liberal economic consensus that taxes don't matter to growth or job creation. The truth, though, is that they do. Small- and medium-sized businesses are the nation's primary employers, and lower individual tax rates have induced thousands of them to shift from filing under the corporate tax system to the individual system, often as limited liability companies or Subchapter S corporations. The Tax Foundation calculates that merely restoring the higher, Clinton-era tax rates on the top two brackets would hit 45% to 55% of small-business income, depending on how inclusively "small business" is defined. These owners will find a way to declare less taxable income. The bottom line is that Mr. Obama is selling the country on a 2% illusion. Unwinding the U.S. commitment in Iraq and allowing the Bush tax cuts to expire can't possibly pay for his agenda. Taxes on the not-so-rich will need to rise as well. On that point, by the way, it's unclear why Mr. Obama thinks his climate-change scheme won't hit all Americans with higher taxes. Selling the right to emit greenhouse gases amounts to a steep new tax on most types of energy and, therefore, on all Americans who use energy. There's a reason that Charlie Rangel's Ways and Means panel, which writes tax law, is holding hearings this week on cap-and-trade regulation. Mr. Obama is very good at portraying his agenda as nothing more than center-left pragmatism. But pragmatists don't ignore the data. And the reality is that the only way to pay for Mr. Obama's ambitions is to reach ever deeper into the pockets of the American middle class.

Ya gotta LOOVVVE the Media...

2009-03-02T15:41:00.000-08:00

Now as many of you know I rarely get political on my little space in blog world, however, given the media's coverage I must speak out and for some educate seeing as the national media won't. It is not in my nature to listen to second hand information spun by others be it someone spewing gossip or the national media. I like to hear it from the horses mouth. Hence, I give you this clip of Rush Limbaugh from the Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC).

http://www.cspan.org/Watch/watch.aspx?MediaId=HP-A-15919

Much has been made of Rush Limbaugh saying that "I hope the President fails", but many people do not know the context in which the comment was made. I for one agree whole heartedly with the statement and in this clip, Rush explains in great detail (as he's done numerous times including the first day he said it on his radio program of which I have been a faithful DAILY listener for 5 years now) the context in which he made the statement. The clip is rather long but if you have a little time, I implore you ALL to take some time to not only 'listen' to the speech, but to HEAR what it is that he is saying. This is not a time to rely on the drive-by media spin and play snippets of what ANY politician and or citizen says. Take the time to hear it from the source.

God Bless you all!

~Damnit!

~Damnit! Does Bmore (Not what ya'll think lol)!!

2009-02-24T16:36:00.000-08:00

Aiight, so if ya'll have been by Mr. Jones spot on this here blog, ya'll know that I ventured south of the Mason Dixon line to kick it wit my lil homie and was not disappointed as expected. The semi-southern hospitality shown to ya boy ~Damnit! was well received and apprecaited. On Friday we fell into an Urban Arts Exhibition of sorts. It was a chill lil event and not to mention, it was FREE! Free food (YEEESS @ the lil dips for the chicken cabobs and for the veggies) and best of all for a lil lush such as I, free drinks since the event was sponsored by Jack Daniels! FAN-FUK'N-TASTIC! LoL.

"Yo bartender, put a drink in dat boyz hand!!" LoL. Naw but here's one of the pieces at the exhibit. Niiiiiiiiiiiiiiiicccccccccceeeee...

The break dancers n backpack boyz were out in force too showing their stuff on tha floor. Ya know ya boy ~Damnit! would've been out on tha floor too but I ain't wanna steal tha show na mean lol. Naw but between this and other highlights that I won't bore ya'll with, I found that Bmore is a fantastic city rich in culture and history that stretches all the way back to Colonial days. Before this weekend Bmore was just a place I used to frequent ta check out the lil clubs downtown. Eh, you learn something new everyday...

All in all, it was a great weekend. Shouts out again to my boy Jones for having me and I will be back soon. Save my parking space yo!

~Damnit!

Lets do LUNCH!

2009-02-07T13:21:00.000-08:00

Every now and again my FH and I take a hiatus from our usual lunch excursions to local salad shops and deli's and decide to have a nice sit down lunch. Yesterday just so happened to be one of those days. As we got to the lobby of our office building she says "Hey, you wanna go to this Japanese resturant? It's so nice. There's a grill at your table and you make your own food!"

~Dam - Bytch, I'm not cooking my food! That's why I'm paying them!

(laughing)

~FH - No seriously. It's really nice (insert gov't here). Come on. It's not too far from here.

I thought about it for a second as I was overcome with curiosity. I agreed and boy was I glad that I did! This place was awesome! The resturant is called Gyu-Kaku (http://www.gyu-kaku.com/) and they have two locations in Manhattan and several others around somewhere lol (hey, that's why I gave ya'll the website!). Honestly, I was so impressed by the ambiance of this resturant that I will definitely bring that special someone there for dinner and drinks. And their lil booths facing 3rd avenue are so conducive to such an occassion with bamboo draw down screnes at each to provide n element of privacy and scerenity (don't get any nasty thoughts ya'll. It's not 'total' privacy LoL). Below are some pix I took:

So how this works is you order what you want from the menu. The meats are marinated and brought out to your table shown above. Both me and the FH ordered a platter that had chicken, shrimp and steak and we also elected to have two lil steak cutlet appetizers.

Here's a table view

Time to throw some meat on tha grill!!!

Here's my FH n I showin our skillz on tha grill!

And after your meal, you even get a scoup of ice cream. Mmmmmmmm...

The food was excellent and the total tab was $80 (Yes, $80 for lunch. Not our most expensive lunch outting by far and let's not EVEN get into how much I spent on lunch with my pops one day LoL). The food was well worth the cost even in 'this economy' as Mr. Jones would say.

So if you're roaming thru the city and wanna grab a delicious meal, I would definitely recommend this spot. Your stomach will surely welcome the break from Applebee's, TGI Fridays, etc. :-)

~Damnit!

THIS moment of clarity...

2009-01-20T17:09:00.000-08:00

As bloggers seemingly unapologetic registered Republican, I believe it is necessary to clarify a few things for some people.

- The historic significance of todays' inauguration of our 44th President Barack H. Obama is not lost on me. As an African American I am extremely happy that we as Americans have to a great extent overcome the racial bigotry that has plagued this country for far too long! Granted, I may not agree with President Obama's platforms or policies, however, I would be remiss if I did not acknowledge the great pride that I was overcome with while viewing todays' events unfold.

- Even tho I disagree with many individuals on the direction this great Union should embark upon, I am overjoyed that the transition of power can be as seemless as it is. There are few countries on this planet where power can cede effortlessly from one individual to another in such a short period of time. Whether you are Democrat or Republican, liberal or conservative, all must marvel and appreciate the precedence established by our forefathers.

- After a spirited discussion with a very close friend of mines on last evening, I am happy that many of our citizens were inspired by President Obama's campaign, election and accendence to the Presidency and I hope that their interest in our political process will continue to sustain far into the future.

Having said that, I am delighted that I was able to witness this day in history and I look forward to debating the policies of our 44th President with you all. Good night, God Bless you all and may God Bless the United States of America!

Oh, and Michelle Obama looked STUNNING today. The epitomy of a strong BLACK woman! I LIVED for her!

~Damnit!

Lets Eat!!

2009-01-03T15:26:00.000-08:00

So let's see...last time I made reference to my cooking, it was suggested that I take pictures so that you all could see my work. Well tonight while preparing dinner I said to myself "Self, why not let them see what you are preparing to consume for the nurishment of my body in Christ thy Lord, Amen (simple prayer but it works when you're alone lol)." Well here goes. Today's dinner consisted of Turkey wings and cabbage served over white rice. Now, I am my own worse critic when it comes to my cooking so I will say this. The cabbage was a tad bit salty for my taste but the white rice blended well which made it absolutely scrumptious! As for the turkey wings, no complaints. The only person in my immediate family that I think makes better turkey wings than I is my mother and even she can't throw SHADE at my work!

Here's another view. Sorry, I'm not big on staging so please forgive tha kid but eh, ya'll get the idea. Ya hungry yet...?

Here, I made ya'll a plate. What would you like to drink with your meal? With Alcohol or w/out? Nothing hard just a lil mixed drink I concocted. :-)

N this here is the outcome when I combine meat, vegetables and spices to near perfection...empty plates and not because it ended up in the garbage like when your grandmother used to force feed Liver and onions to you in your pre-pubescent years (YUCK!). No sir, when you come to casa de ~Damnit!, your tastebuds will be pleased as some of you are aware. Ask about me! *Wink*

So that's all I have for ya'll today. Happy New Year!

~Damnit!

Da shit that makes me LAUGH!

2008-12-11T18:32:00.000-08:00

Yea yea yea it's been a good minute I know. To be honest, I didn't have anything to talk about so why bore any of you. Of course I commented on many of ya'llz thought provoking post. Anywho, in the past couple of days I've come across some things that made me laugh. Either they'll make you laugh also or have you lookin at me like "Damnit, you're an ass!" Either way, here we go.

So, everyday at lunch time me and PG (Pussy Galore: My Fag Hag) take a lil stroll around the city to converse about what's going on in our lives. Personally, I take the opportunity to marvel at the handsome men wondering around the city. She, in turn forces me to accompany her shopping for whatever her heart desires. On Monday we stumbled into a boutique to purchase some panties for her and wallaaaa...

Now lol...I've NEVER seen panties this big! Yes I know there are large women out there but this shit cracked me up! Just to keep things in perspective, PG is about 5'8, 150 lbs (If I'm off PG, don't hit me...she's a Trenton, NJ 'I'll fuck you up' type a chick!) girl. But yo, we BOTH were DYING to see panties this big. Funny thing is when I exclaimed "I didn't know they made those that big!" she responded with "Well, did you think big chicks just walked around free ballin it?" Chicks wit ballz...no comment LoL. But yea, that made me chuckle...n chuckle...n, well ya'll get the point. What made the shit even funnier was when the employee asked us "Are ya'll finding what you need?" I responded "That and so much more!"

**Disclaimer: I don't hate on big people like that, but GOT DAMN! Dem some HUGE Panties!!***

Needless to say, we've (or I...hehe) have devised a plan for a friend of hers for Christmas (I'll update ya'll on that later)

Next, during todays walk I was shocked by this image. I know people are lazy but I mean damn. Conversely, I do applaud Duane Reade for promoting increased consumer spending during this recession that I have chosen NOT to particpate in. I give you pix number two:

In the words of Mr. Jones "Now waaaaiiiiiiiiiiitttttt...." Never in my life have I seen a basket on wheels! This shyt was hilarious to me today. I mean I guess the convenience of it all is kool but damn... Ya gotta love Duane Reade. They said "We want you to shop, and if that means you don't want to carry all your items, just pull that shit behind you. I LOVE IT! Iono.

Well here's a lil light hearted post from me. Nothing serious going on over here but it was time for an update. Everyone be safe!

~Damnit!

Angels, Watching Over ME...

2008-10-19T14:36:00.000-07:00

Given everything that's going on around the world and w/in our country, it is often good to sit back and be appreciative for the little things. Over the years I have realized that I am immensely blessed. Life could be so much worse but it's not and sometimes a blessing will come out of no where making me feel like there truely are angels watching over me.

Today was no exception. I woke up today feeling like I needed to go shopping. Not for cloths or food but for some things that my apt has been lacking Now anyone that knows me understands two things: 1) I hate shopping & 2) I am not good at interior decorating. It's just not my fortay. After consulting wit my boy Mr. Jones I narrowed down what I wanted to purchase. As I explained to Jones "Baaaaaaaaaby, I need a list cause when ~Damnits! wallet see's the light of day, his Visa takes a beating!" LoL. All that said, the story really is what happened at checkout.

So here I am after cruising the store n slapping my sticky fingers everytime it grabbed something that wasn't on the coveted list of necessities, I walked towards the register line and this seasoned African American woman. She gave off the aura of a wise aunt as she greated me "Hey young man. How are you?" I responded "Well Imma be depressed once you finish ringing up these items."

Aunt BB&B: Oh no baby don't be depressed. Praise God that you can afford to purchase these things because there are people who can't..."

DMT: That's true.

Aunt BB&B: Do you have a coupon?

DMT: No I don't. I didn't know you could use coupons in here...

Aunt BB&B: Of course you can! Imma find you a coupon baby.

So as she rang up my items to which doing some rough math in my head I estimated that I had easily spent $150, Aunt BB&B managed to not find the bar code on one of my items and decided that she wouldn't charge me for it (Price: $16...questionable judgement but I did my part). Then after ringing up my items, she made it her duity to find me a coupon which gave me 20% off my total purchase price. When it was time to swipe my debit card, the final cost went from $150 to $99 n some change. The register read 'APPROVED' and as she handed me my bags, Aunt BB&B exclaimed "Ok baby there you go. You have a BLESSED day!" to which I responded "Thank you ma'am. You do too." In our 5 minute interaction, she became the Angel that assisted me in staying w/in the budget I had set for todays shopping excursion.

Thanks Aunt BB&B!

~Damnit!

Why don't I have a man...?

2008-10-05T14:02:00.000-07:00

- Spinach Salad with hard boiled eggs, tomato's and cucumbers

- Home made mashed potato's sprinkled with some minced garlic & pepper topped with Country Crock butter

- Fresh green beans wit a hint of butter for flavor.

- Tender BBQ Ribs seasoned close to perfection (My momz are slightly better then mine lol)

- *Bonus* Deviled eggs because I love them and just in case I need a late Sunday night football snack!

All of this and it's just me. Imagine if it were you and I...

~Damnit!

Ma Bitch has a First Name!!!

2008-09-19T10:14:00.000-07:00

As mentioned in a previous post, after numerous years of Sprint pimpin ya boy ~Damnit!, ya boy having been disgusted with the performance of my old phone, finally purchased a Blackberry. The majority (roughly 85%) of it on Sprints dime. However, much like a parent of an unborn child I had no name for ma bitch (affectionately) until my boy O and I gathered for a brief pow wow and all of a sudden she was named!

O named my Blackberry 'Cran' (Due to her maroon color) and I absolutely LOVED IT! We even gave Cran some characteristics which are as follows:

- She's an old white woman with salt & pepper stringy hair
- She's from money, originally from Europe and moved to the US in 1912; she married a black man in 1923 (*Wink*) and was disowned
- Clearly she likes to get it in cause she has 11 kids!!!
- Well educated and pretty swift on (or off) her feet too lol.

Ironically, Cran shares the same life story as my Great Grandmother. Go figure...

Anway, so everyone when ya see her make sure you call ma bitch by name cause 'Cran' goes HARD! LMAO.

~Damnit!

Over/Under...

2008-09-12T19:00:00.000-07:00

I find that the convoluted valuation with regards to the importance of sex and or intimacy w/in the gay lifestyle puzzling. Personally, I just don't understand how some people can mitigate the importance of sex in a relationship or life in general...it boggles the mind. Granted, sex isn't everything, however, it is important and can make or break a relationship.

For many moons (I won't venture to proclaim the number of years I've engaged in this lifestyle) I've conversed with individuals that proudly say that sex is "overrated". A friend and I got into such a discussion on today and I was flabbergasted at the idea that you can have a long term relationship void of intimacy or sex. Intimacy/sex plays a major roll in a partnership and if one party is not 'sexual', where does that leave the other party? Everyone wants to be wanted/desired both mentally and physically. If you want a 'friendship' type of relationship, why not just be friends. Hang out, go to the movies, dinner, etc...and be 'friends', however, to be with me on a lover level, I believe sex is important. I have a friend who was in a long term relationship for a half decade and didn't have that deep bond that would have been garnered thru intimacy because they didn't engage in sex. When they did, it was usually with a third party. The relationship proved to be tasking and ultimately faultered because the individuals didn't have that deep connection. Allow me to retort, great 'friends', failed lovers.

All that said, do you agree with the idea that sex is overrated...? Could you be in a sexless relationship? Just to be clear, my reference to a 'relationship' is in the context of lovers, not 'friends/associates'. Have you ever been in a 'sexless relationship' and how did that experience work for you? I generally don't do solicitation and response post but I await your comments and will go against my self imposed rule and respond after gathering a varying of opinions.

One luv!

~Damnit!

Me...? Bullets

2008-08-21T19:08:00.000-07:00

So it's me? Isn't it always? So I'm told...
Didn't you know it before...? Was I hiding something? Didn't think I could...
Difficult, yes. Unapologetic, yes. ~Damnit!, yes. Phony or fickle, no...
Can be understood with time, yes. Accepted for who I am, rarely...
Can withdraw in a heartbeat, absolutely!
Require much from anyone, no. Offer much to everyone, yes!
Tired, yes.
Loyal, undoubtedly!
ICE COLD, yes.
Will anyone ever be able to melt that which lies w/in me? I can't call it...
If I allowed one to fill in those empty bullets, what would be said? Would it affect the way I feel?
Explainations don't matter...
Facts don't matter...
For every beginning, there is an end...
Who am I? O wait, I know...

~Damnit!

Missing you like CRAZY!!!

2008-08-17T13:02:00.000-07:00

He doesn't blog, but he know's who he is...

Lets see...

2008-08-16T12:14:00.000-07:00

Well seeing as I haven't written anything on my spot for some time, I guess I'll scribe a few words. Not much has happened tho so I felt no need to update but, here goes...

- It seems that I still got 'it'. What is 'it' you ask? Well take for instance Monday morning. I'm riding the iron horse beneath the streets of Manhattan whose services are provided by the Metropolitan Transit Authority listening to the sweet melodies of Chrisette Michelle flowing from Damita Joe. As the duece (#2 train) screeches to a halt, I swiveled sideways to allow my fellow commuters unfettered access to the exit when I feel a light but intentional tickle on the left side of my back. I turn to find this exquisite specimen of the female persuasion staring and smiling at me with her hand outstretched towards me. I look and she's holding a piece of paper. Curious, I took the paper from her and examined it to find her name and number written on it. I returned my eyes to her awaiting face all a glow with a smile and I returned the appropriate warm greeting. *STAND clear of the closing doors, please* The doors shut and my chariot rode off. I looked at the number and written on the back was "Call between 6 - 11 pm anytime. I smiled, placed the number in my pocket. Ironically, the chorus of the song I had just finished listening to said "It's like a Dreeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaamm to meeeee..." CLEARLY, I still can pull the females. LoL.

- My 'brick' (as Mr. Jones calls my cell phone) has gone far beyond being the heavy load that I was forced to tote around with me; the cost of keeping in touch. No, THIS BITCH for the past month decided that ~Damint! no longer requires the use of the 'i' button on the phone. At first it seemed the 'i' was on vacation and '5' was now playing the roll of 'i' whenever I summoned. I dealt with it for as long as I could but it was time to handle this situation. After lunch, me and my fag hag walked to the Sprint store to have the ho serviced. Upon returning I was told it could not be fixed and a new phone had been ordered. Unfortunately, the newest version of my phone. No sir, THIS will not do. I returned to the office and commenced to phone Sprint, hustled past Mrs. PCS to a live representative where I laid out what I expected my celular provider of 10 years to accomplish for me. Two and a half hours, 6 supervisors and 1 insurance representative later, my BlackBerry Curve was set to be overnighted to me for several hundred dollars less than Sprint blindly robs their 'other' customers for. It arrived Friday and I LOVE HER! She needs a name tho...haven't decided. Something that gives off the appropriate level of 'SHADE' when I speak of her in public lol. Oh, and to top it off, the replacement phone that was ordered by the sprint store will be ready for pick up on Tuesday. eBay anyone..?! LMAO!

- Thursday I went to court and got my speeding ticket reduced from '86 in a 65' and '$400 (4 pts) to a '70 in a 65' and a $106 ticket, no points. And people say that my mouth is just trouble. Law School here I come!!!

Well that's it folks. Now you know, and know is half the battle!

~Damnit!

See you when I get there...

2008-07-23T09:30:00.000-07:00

It was 11:30 pm last night when my phone rang out, disturbing the peace of my quiet house. I rose from the bed knowing something was wrong because everyone knows when and when not to call my phone. A number came up that was somewhat familiar to me. An old friend from my past, long time no see. The voice on the other end asked how I was, to which I replied "I'm aiight. You?" to which he responded "I'm tryna maintain too."

Him: Well I don't know if you care or not but So & So passed away tonight.

DMT: Oh my God... Damn yo. Are you ok?

Him: I'm trying. I can't believe he's dead.

See me and S&S had a falling out a couple years ago. I have not spoken to or seen him during this time. From his opening statement, I gathered that S&S passed w/out knowing that I had long forgiven him for what he did to me and I held no ill will. See in my mind what was done was done. Lifes experiences are supposed to make you wiser and with that experience I learned a valuable lesson.

This morning as I did last night, I sent up a lil prayer to my fallen old friend. No one knows why God chose now to bring you home, but it is in his will that it be done. My eyes will be shut when your funeral comes, for I want to remember you as the strong MAN you were!

See you when I get there yo! You know who you are S&S!

~Damnit!

N i'M OuT DIs BIaCH!!!

2008-07-02T21:17:00.000-07:00

Well in a couple hours I'll be on my way to tha Chi! Tryna see what it's all about na mean! I'm sure it'll be a worthwhile experience seeing as every experience DAMNIT! has anywhere is worthwhile in some form or fashion. LoL naw but Imma just get my relax on and see what there is to see. Got tha new digital too so Imma snap some pix too. Laptop will be in tow but I don't plan to be on dis biach often so I'll see ya when I see ya! Have a safe and enjoyable 4th of July. GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!

~Damnit!

FUCK ~2~ BUDDY!!!

2008-06-19T09:49:00.000-07:00

I've never been one to divulge my sexual exploits here in Blog Universe but eh, what tha hell. I'm at work, lunch is here, I'm tired as shit (explaination below) and I am bored so here goes.

Since Saturday I've had one problem after another. Lost electricity from Saturday afternoon to Tuesday; Fridge died Tuesday so lost all food that wasn't previously lost; boss tryna fire me (that's usual for her lol). Oh, and my beloved Lakers lost but eh, Congrats to the Celts for a GREAT game! With all this crap going on, I was delighted when my cell was all a glow alerting me to a new message. Upon investigation I found it was my lil papi...Imma call him Kickz cause he's got a gazillion sneakers lol. Kickz is about my height, a taste lighter than me, slim (I love my slim boyz *Wink*), nice dick and da ass...*Sigh* (Singin) APPLE BOTTOM JEAAAANNN AND THA... ok i dont' know the words to that dumb song but you get the point.

Anywho, Kickz opens up the convo as usual:

Kickz: Ey punk... How's work?

(Sidenote, he always calls me punk since we met back around February. Ironically I become daddy when he's on his back...go figure)

DMT: Work sucks. What you up to.

Kickz: I'm off today. I kinda want you LoLz

DMT: O werd...

Kickz: Yea man. I want you in me right now! LoL

DMT: Mmmm... :-) Well it's very coozy in there. I love it!

DMT: Well bet, you know where I stay ma dude. Slide thru tonight!

I must say I never hesitate when Kickz comes a calling. We have some AMMMMMAAAAAZING SEX! Actually depending on the day and the mood, it could be some rough bang you out around my crib and I carry you to the bedroom sex (3 Saturdays ago) or some serious, sensual, "can I let my dick tickle the bottom right corner of your heart" kinda sex. Last night was the latter.

Kickz comes in gives me a kiss and this lil fucker can kiss!! Kudos! And we sit on the couch. Mind you, Damnit! while waiting (n sippin some Henny) for him to show fell asleep on the couch, he ended up being downstairs for 15 minutes callin my phone. Hey, it's 11:30! I digress... So Kickz tells me about his day as he's laying on my lap and of course wit his lil sexy ass that close to my dick in the words of Mya Angelo "Still, I RISE!" Needless to say my name changed numerous times from 'Daddy' to 'Damn Nikka' etc. Loved every moment of it.

Relishing the afterglow, we got caught up in our lil light hearted banter and the thought kinda floated thru my brain. Kickz is a really kool dude. I mean he's sexy, light hearted, care free lil papi...the antithesis of Damnit! (outside of the sexy part. Don't get it twisted!). So I told Kickz "Yo we should hang out one day. Maybe hang out in the city one Saturday, walk around, eat. Ya know, kick it." With a smile Kickz was like "Yea that would be kool, punk!" And with a kiss our plans were sealed. I drove him home at 3 am and hence why I arrived promptly to work at 10:30 (suppsed to be here at 9:30 lol) tired as all hell. Was it worth it? For Kickz ass...HELLZ FUCKIN YEA!

~Damnit!

Betrayal Revisited

2008-06-18T12:13:00.000-07:00

As the cliché goes "Time heals all wounds." Realizing years ago that this statement is absurd to a certain degree, I can agree that time does mitigate the anger one may feel towards the betrayer. And so it goes...

I am by nature a complex man in a simple body. It takes a lot to get under my skin because very few people have the opportunity to get that close to me. The fact that said individual was able to says a lot about him, however, I believe it says more about me. No one likes to have their feelings disregarded, crushed, and their trust bro-ken in two...especially me. It only takes one time for me and I become immune to you. Cold and void of feeling. Unfortunately, with this individual I've only been able to achieve the former. I have however managed to enact these policies when dealing with said individual:

1. No all day text or long convo's. One word answers wherever possible. All comments requiring a larger message is replaced with the word 'Indeed'.

2. Rebuff efforts to meet up and chill. 'Chillin' is not a requirment and will be on my terms, not his.

3. Keep my business to myself. Yea you once were close...'once' being the operative word.

And finally...

4. I forgive you. Whole heartedly. And in doing so, I am free to befriend again having learned a valuable lesson.

Life is about the experiences you have which shape the person you are. I posess a great awareness of self. I know who I am. I am proud of who I am and I am overjoyed at the thought of who I will become as I continue down this path called Life. I am...healed.

~Damnit!

PEACE BITCHES!!!! LoL

2008-06-06T08:05:00.000-07:00

I would not venture to say that I am 'well traveled', but I must admit that I'm not one of these katz that has never ventured out of the New York metropolitan area. Of these 50 states that are united (48 contiguous) I have visited Maine, Massachusetts, New Hampshire, Rhode Island, Conneticutt, Pensylvania, Maryland, North Carolina, Georgia, Florida, Louisiana, Nebraska, Iowa, Michigan...ummmmmmm yea that's it. Oh lest I forget my stint in Columbia with those Districts for my intellectual nutriment. I've also traveled beyond our boarders to Cancun, Cozemel, Jamaica and the Bahamas. Great huh? Seems like I've gotten around huh? Well the problem is that all these places I've been, it's always been with a parental/guardian figure. Never with 'friends'.

In the 4 years that I spent in college my spring breaks were spent at home in New Jersey...no dough. After graduating ya boy was still broke as a joke. It's a damn shame to even admit this but I have not been on vacation in FIVE (5) YEARS!!! LoL. Besides the fact that I'm not the greatest at saving, it seemed like the friends or aquantences I surrounded myself with didn't have the finances necessary to get away. So complacency set in and vacations were spent sleeping and chillin, however, 2008 has been quite eye opening for me. I've had some kind of, I don't even know what to call it...an awakening. There is so much out there that I have not allowed myself to experience because in a way I've been AFRAID to go it alone. I recently began thinking "WTF is wrong with you (insert gov't name here)?! You're not broke like that no more. Da hell is your bitch ass sitting around wasting oxygen for?!"

Having called myself everything but a child of God, I made a promiss to myself that this summer I will emerge anew. As a child I was extremely inquisitive and as a young man I will fulfill my destiny and become an explorer! I've decided to shed the shackles that have kept me stagnant. No longer will I wait nor do I require the company of friends or aquantences to partake in my journeys (although it would be nice but eh, so would a million dollars). The time has come for da kid to do tha damn thing! :-)

Having said all that, I found out thru a friend that the Taste of Chicago is next month around July 4th weekend and ya boy Damnit on yesterday booked his flight and Hotel. Yup, Imma be there tryna see what I can get into. Never been up there so this should be interesting. And as the theme of this post suggest da kid is riding dolo! First time ever. It's like the emancipation of me. Anywho, anybody out in tha Chi tryna get up and show ya boy tha city, holla!!

PEACE BITCHES!!! LoL

~Damnit!

Long Distance Relationships...Iono.

2008-05-30T09:48:00.000-07:00

It takes a lot of patience and determination to be able to engage in a long distance relationship (henceforward LDR). I can't say that I have ever truly been in one. Sure I've entertained katz that lived in other states but upon realizing that neither of us were willing to uproot ourselves or do the traveling that is required to keep such a relationship going, the connection just dwindled into an internet friendship. But as I sit back and observe others whom are engaging in them I can't help but wonder...is it me?

I do not require much in my potential mate. Well maybe I do... A good 'career' or at least aspirations towards those ends, stimulating conversation, charisma, self and world awareness to name a few. My superficial side does require one to be attractive and well kept but what about those other things that most if not all relationships require? Those moments of staring at each other as if nothing or no one else even matters. Walking down the street just enjoying each others company, laughing at the stupid shit each other says or if either of us trips slightly on a crack in the sidewalk. Lest I forget the sex to be had on a whim. Feeling that persons breathe on the back of my neck as we drift to sleep. Waking them up to a cheese omlet, fresh home fries, bacon, biscuts w/butter and some apple sauce just to nourish my dude for a morning romp. Could I forgo all of this for weeks on end; countless cancelations that may be encountered? Rotational visits to each others homes just for a weekend we both wish would never end? I just can't imagine it.

Watching two friends engage in these LDR have caused me to question my stance against them. One whom met his bf over the internet is now in marital bliss since dude moved up here is a success story for the ages. They are inseparable. Definitely a sight to behold. The second individual whom met his interest on a social trip is just beginning his and although finding it difficult as I would imagine would be at first, is willing to engage in it with hopes that the desired outcome will lead to lasting love. In his case, dude has decided to uproot himself and move to NYC...eventually. All I can do is sit back and say wow. I wish them all the luck and well wishes in the world.

I posed this question to myself... Could Damnit! do it? The saying goes there is someone for everybody. Could my someone be 'somewhere' else and by being closed minded (stubborn I guess is the word some people call me...among others never uttered) to the experience and or challenge, I am consciously dooming myself to a world filled with celebrity sports figures running across my screen or porn stars gallivanting from clip to clip on my favorites list? What if I could humble myself to the possibilities of LDL (Long Distant Love)? Hell, it's not like my short distant love affairs have panned out as I've desired. What if I would allow myself to hop on a plane to see that 'ONE' that for those brief moments in time will seem like eternity? I mean, what if...? What...if? Iono...

Damnit!

Betrayal!

2008-05-09T20:29:00.000-07:00

How do you handle it...? I'm not a vindictive person but sometimes I feel like getting even is necessary! I think Imma pray and go to sleep.

~Damnit!

A Month...

2008-04-23T18:09:00.001-07:00

Time has certainly marched on since I last scribed my thoughts to this virtual notepad... It's been a month. A month since me and Lil Dred split. It's been a month (give or take) since Lil Man was removed from my home. It's been a month since I relieved myself of the stresses that had begun to encompass my life and it has been a month that which I have chose to redefine ~Damnit! For better or for worse, I am Damnit...nothing more, nothing less.

So let's see what do I have to say to the few that read my lil spot on the web. Ummmmmmm I'm still black. My cunning wit has returned but my patience for many has waned. I've been keeping to myself lately and have been trying to become comfortable going out alone in an attempt to meet new people. As charismatic as I am, I tend to be a tad bit reserved when emerced in crowds. I've gone shopping lately in an attempt to change my style. The baggy cloths have been traded in for more form fitting cloths that compliments my new found slim figure. Even in my solitude, I feel sexy. Hmmmmmm...weird huh.

The crew...well ask any of them and they will tell you that I've been noticibly absent even when present. Granted my mind has been else where, wondering, searching for a spark w/in me. It's an enlightening experience, trust.

The single life...WHO THE FUCK created this shit! I forgot how it felt to be single. To be horny and not have anyone to get it in with...to hold; to talk to. It's weird and interesting at the same damn time. Regrets, naw. I don't do those. Conversely, this has been a month I tell ya. Normalcy is returning and I will soon be back to my usual ~Damnit form. Until then I leave you all with this...( ). Whatever you can fit in those brackets, that's what I'm leaving you with. If you truly know me, you'll know what's in there. Cheers!

~Damnit!

Stress Relief...

2008-03-20T16:44:00.000-07:00

Yea I know it's been a while for me on this shit. Have been going thru a lot lately but such is life. This post will be extremely short and will lack the creativity that my writing has been known for and you all have grown acustomed to...

Me n Lil Dred are no more. After months of turmoil and myself not being happy in our relationship, I ended it. I will not reveal details because not for nothing, I am not one to easily allow people into my mind. People come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. Reasons are revealed, seasons change, and life is short. Life goes on.

After a couple of weeks filled with issues and arguments between me and Lil man, I kicked him out of my house for various reasons. A few days passed and he showed up and apologized for what happenend and took responsibility for what he did. After a long talk I agreed to give him one last chance to which he said that he is dedicated to doing what he's supposed to do and follow the rules. So we're currently cool.

The job situation is still the same. That is one stress that I am currently unable to change but things will change for the better in God's time. My heart is heavy but my head is held high.

~Damnit!

IT'S TIME: Update!

2008-02-05T20:14:00.000-08:00

This will be short, sweet, and to the point... The CFO has been FIRED! It happened yesterday while I was at home chillin. The announcement was made today! I can't help but be giddy! I don't want to take pleasure in other peoples pain, however, shit is hitting the fan finally and I can't help but to be happy. Next on the list is my boss. She's on the chopping block too. As for me personally, my resume has been out there for 2 weeks and I'm happy to announce that I've actually had to turn down positions! GOD IS GOOD! I am prayerful and as I've stated before, I ask God to have mercy on those who've forsaken me. God is good!

Lil man has been here for a week now and things are going good. He is a work in progress but the progress has been striking. I am happy that he is here and I look forward to being a positive influience in his life. I love this boy as a older brother loves his young patawan. He will be ok.

My Super bowl shindig went well. I had 20 peeps here in my house and I proved to be a great host! Everyone seemed to have fun and everyone respected my household. I love all of my friends and aquantences! We will do it again.

All I have to say is God works in mysterious ways. I can only sit back and marvel at his greatness. I love you all! I pray for everyones sucess in the days/months to come.

~Damnit!

IT'S TIME!!!!

2008-01-24T17:34:00.000-08:00

For nearly two years now I have been surrounded by individuals for 8+ hours a day, five times a week with an occassional Saturday who lack the integrity of a feline, the poise of a flacid penis, and the intellectual magnitude of a jelly bean! I've dealt with incompetence abound from the CFO in a mid-life crisis fucking a subordinate to the Boss that thinks her job is to avoid all accountability to the continuous insanity on display daily. However, todays events have prodded me into action. IT'S TIME!!!

Today, my friend and coworker was fired not for work performance, but for speaking out against the 'status quo'. People continuously telling you "You're not doing your job" or "You need to give more time" or "You're getting and not giving back", etc... What's worse is that when other people (of different nationality I might add...of the orient) sit there and say that they are 'overwhelmed' and get stripped of their responsibilities but I and my friend a few others are told that they don't care about our workload..."Do your JOB", it's a slap in the face. And I've had enough of the bull shyt! I have also spoken up and our division has even made suggestions on how to effectively change the department to get the work done only to get smacked down by the CFO saying "This is how it is. No changes will be made! The work has to get done so make it happen!" That was two months ago and last week we were called into a meeting to tell us that the same work is not getting done due to an inefficient process. Then the audacity of this bitch to ask for suggestions on how we could get the work done after I had worked 12 hour days for 2 weeks, six days a week only to be told it's not enough...?! FUCK THEM!

IT'S TIME!!! I began my search for a new job a few weeks ago and the quest for a new gig has hastened since last week and now today's dose of bull shit! I have an appointment with a head hunter tomorrow for a position for which I'm qualified. Hopefully this meeting will lead to an interview and ultimately exclaiming like Della Reese "Kiss my EN-TIRE ASS!!!" I am studying for the LSAT's and God willing will be enrolled in Law School (NYU here I come!) in the Fall of 09. The Bible says "He will make your enemy your footstool!" I will pray that the Lord is merciful...

~Damnit!

PS: I got my apt and it's cool. Everything is going well and I'll update ya'll later.

~1~

~Damnit!

Word of the Day: December 20th, 2007

2007-12-20T16:37:00.001-08:00

So ummmmmmm...yea, I wanted my friends to feel my pain today. So what follows is my morning WOTD text to them. Enjoy...

Word of the Day...Gone!

*Singin*

Now I don't wanna make excuses baby... cause that just won't turn you on! No No...
But if there's something that IIIIIIIIIIIIIIII can dooooo yea...won't the manual knooooww?
The time is passing so slow-ly now (tic tic tic tic tic), Guess that's my ride without you (guess that's my ride w/out yooou)
Shit may-be I'll just slap this smel-leee maaaannn, yea... But I don't wanna get suuueed!
So I'll just hang around n watch towns I pass thru, to take my mind off missing yooou.
And I know in my heart, that I miss my songs from iii-Tunes...You know I do...YEEEEEAAA.

I'm just sitting here....no headphones in my ears... I'm tryin my best to be a man and be stroong.
I'm drivin myself insane wishin I could just press play...
But the truth..re..mains..it's..GONE (My iPod is) GONE...GONE...
my iPods gone...IPOD IS...GONE!

iPod Damita Joe July 12, 2006 - December 19th, 2007. RIP

~Damnit!

Lift as we Climb

2007-12-01T17:47:00.000-08:00

I've always been an optimist, shying away from those who would have a negative influence in my life. This practice has afforded me many opportunities for which I am eternally blessed. However, to those whom much is given, much is expected.

On last Sunday when my phone abruptly interupted the loud whistle blown by the referee in the Football game, I saw O's name appear and I thought he had some SHADE to share with his CEO of...well you know my company. Upon answering I realized that it was lil man from the night before on the phone. Although I slightly remembered what I had offered (yes you guessed it...Damnit was quite bent during that convo at Shawnqt's krib), I was still taken aback by what was being requested of me. I didn't immediately render an affirmative response. On my way home I pondered the idea of having lil man stay in my home. Many thoughts went thru my head but the prevailing thought during my 35 minute drive south on the NJ Turnpike from Lil Dred's crib was "What is God up to?" Here I am on the eve of finally achieving my long awaited departure from 'parent rearing' towards blessed indepence. I drove in silence and had a lil talk with the man upstairs. Interestingly enough I found peace in this conversation for a number of reasons. One, I've been blessed in my life thus far. When my athletic scholarship expired while in college and I had no place to stay, my boy allowed me to bum on his couch for my last year...he was a blessing. I've had an ok (not good per my standards, however, profitable) career since leaving college. The few family members (2) that know of my sexual preference are not all that jubilant about it, but have never gone totally off the deep end although mom dukes has had to withstand multiple verbal armageddons rendered by I. All in all, I can't and refuse to complain.

Lil man and I spoke for about a hour that night and I agreed to take him in. I also spoke to him about my expectations of him and my goals for him. Fact is I want him to succeed and be the MAN that his father does not envision him to be but I KNOW he can become with proper guidance. As a child of God marvelously created in his image, he is destined for greatness! I believe that the adversity lil man has faced in his life thus far brought him to O & I for a reason...for that I am greatful. My prayer is that I can be a positive influence in lil man's life by challenging him to be the strong black man that I believe he can be.

Today I put a deposit on my new apartment in the burbs (city living is for the birds...lol) and with the new year will come renewed independence. February will bring forth a transformation in lil mans destiny. Everyday I plan to challenge him to ACHIEVE in EVERYTHING he puts his mind to. 'He Ain't Heavy' is the title of the picture captioned above... Helping lil man is not a burden in my mind, but a responsibility that I humbly and whole heartedly accept! He is now my son.

O, we've spoken and I've expressed to you that anything within my power that I can do to help you during this transitional period until Feb 1st just ask and I will work it out. I love you ma dude.

~Damnit!

MAKES ME WANNA HOLLA: Chapter I - Against the World!

2007-11-08T05:30:00.000-08:00

(Simultaneously done with hand movements...)
"You and me against the world! Oooooo Right!"

My mother made up that lil nursery rhyme when I was about two years old living in the Bronx. It was our special saying to symbolize our bond and our promiss to each other to face the world united as a family. It provided comfort for me throughout the years as I matured towards the man that I am today, but in retrospect this very rhyme is the cause for all the turmoil and strife in our relationship to this day.

I was kept on a tight leash all throughout my teenage years even after moving to New Jersey and she working in Manhattan to keep a roof over our head. Upon graduating HS I left for college where after my first year a fissure began to form in our relationship. Growing up is a natural progression of life but the problem with single parenthood is the reluctance of the parent to let go. Simularly, as a young adult I sought my independence not only in mind but in spirit as well. Since then I've felt that the world I have fought was moreso represented by the very woman whom birthed me. There have been numerous incidents that bring me to how I feel about her today...

The first incident has to do with my sexuality and how my mother was made aware of it. The man to whom my mother was married to (should've only lasted 6 months to a year per her friends and my estimates...) was an ass hole. No it had nothing to do with some odd rivalry for my mothers affections. My issue with him stemmed around the fact that he TRIED to be my 'father' at a time where one was not needed. He entered the picture when I was 19 so his intrusion into my life was unwarrented and unnecessary. This caused us to continuously argue inadvertently placing my mother in the middle. Rather than be the source of her discontent, I stayed to myself most of the time when I was home from college. However, the second summer home, my disgust for this man and my anger towards him was only solidified. After a heated argument with him over computer usage to which I made it known to him that he was not my father, he decided to go thru my personal belongings where he found incriminating evidence as to my sexual preference on a floppy disk (remember those...?); copied the contents onto another disk and submitted it to my mother for review. The following morning around eight I discovered her on the computer. "What are you doing?" I asked. "(Idiot) said that there's something on this disk that I need to see but I can't find it..." "Let me help" I said and after perusing the files, I noticed that they were my files. I popped out the disk and the disk wasn't mines. I began to delete the files and I told her that I know not what it is she was looking for but these were my files on this disk. Upon furiously returning to my room to the sounds of them arguing, she comes to my room and request to see this disk and ask if I was gay. I told her my property is none of her damn business and that I was bi! I left the house for a week w/out returning ignoring all phone calls. Upon my return he was kicked out of the house...that lasted 2 days. Strike number 1 for her...

A year + more of their turmoltuous relationship caused their marriage to faulter and she put him out the house. At the same time, my mother had been thru multiple lay offs and after the 5th one, she gave up a 20 plus year career to concentrate on her ventures. I was out of school but living at home not having fully established myself as of yet. Contributing, of course...what black parent in America doesn't require their children to contribute to the bills. Plus "You and me against the WORLD..." right? Our relationship has been bad since.

(Fast Forward...)

My mother and I are very much alike and we don't get along well when we live together. Since 2003 I've been forced into two rolls in her life. That of 'husband' when finances are needed and 'son' when she doesn't want to hear or can't bare to hear my views/opinions. I've dealt with her attempted suicide, alone (not the first one...)...and the constant fear and then desensitization to subtile threats to reattempt such an act. The stress of living in the same household prompted me to move out in 2005 only to be begged to move back in a year later to help save the house. This has involved me paying the bulk of a 2K a month mortgage alone (and Captain, refinancing was not an option at this point as it had been done multiple times). I am at my wits end. Due to the personal decisions made by my mother, I have placed my life on hold and lost valuable time all in the spirit of "You and me against the WORLD. Oooooooo Right!".

On yesterday my mother asked "Why do you hate me?" for which I responded "I don't hate you." No I don't hate my mother, I love her very much, however, I detest what our relationship has become! Every word she utters often results in a harsh exchange because I am always on defense. I pray that with her emergence back into Corporate America and my impending move back out of my childhood dwelling in the coming months will revive our once healthy relationship.

~Damnit!

Preface: MAKES ME WANNA HOLLA!!!!!

2007-10-29T10:45:00.000-07:00

I've taken a step back as of late to peruse various blogs and the topics offered by different individuals here...commented on many post and presented how I view the topic at hand. My own space has lacked growth due to the absense of credible thoughts worthy enough to scribe to this electronic notepad. I REFUSE to bore people with everything that happens with me everyday especially when I dismiss most of the bull shyt anyway. However, recently I've been inspired to write a couple of post. One of which was inspired by Mr_Jones who wished to peruse the passageways within my mind with respects to Affirmative Action. I relish the opportunity to share with you all my thoughts on this subject and it will be included within the series of blogs to follow. I will make an effort to complete all of the post this week. I look forward to your feedback.

~Damnit!

Roku...And the beat goes on!

2007-10-02T18:17:00.000-07:00

Well whould've thunk it? When it all began, I just thought it would be the usual... First month and we're cool. Second month and either he or I would get tired. By the third month I'd be bored and he'd be over my acute personality. Needless to say just this past weekend we've made Roku and flourishing! O YEA! LoL

In case my previous reference has eluded the average reader, my relationships have seldom lasted very long, but this one has past all test thus far. He ignores my overbaring personality when I become an ass hole and I ignore his political views which are usually opposite of mines. Personally I love it! Of all the exciting things happening in my life right now (one of which I won't mention because it's still in the initial stages...stay tuned...), he is probably the most exciting! He calms my spirit. His warmth (mostly HEAT when we sleep) and sensitivity melts the ice that I often form around my heart to protect myself from the ignorant bastards and the insipid debutantes (as some homo's can be whether fem or masc) that roam the Earth. Datz ma Lil Dred!

So for our Roku, he wrote me a poem and outside of a few variations in the words, it's posted on his blog. Said poem was encased not only with glass, but with love to which I say thank you. I am blessed to have you in my life Lil Dred. Cheers to a future of ignoring each other when we're get'n on each others nerves (lol) and continuing to make each other happy day in and day out.

Much Love Lil Dred!

~Damnit!

Word of the Day...History!

2007-09-14T06:21:00.000-07:00

Everyday I send a 'Word of the Day' to my friends via text. Sometimes lighthearted and other times inspirational. Lil Dred felt this was a message that others would appreciate as much as he did and so I present to you all...the Word. Enjoy...

Word of the Day...History!

Gone are the days of flashy chains and thangs. Gold ropes were dope but now it's more about givin our young brothaz hope. Train a child in tha way he should go yea I know but where I'm goin the children can't roll. Fall back and pick em up, show them the ropes? I can dig that but will they dig me in my baby blue button down n my manicured Stacy Adams spewing prophetic words? Who knows but we've gotta try to change his story on the streets before our brothaz become history in a blink! One Love!

Happy Friday!

~Damnit!

The Missing (Deleted) Comment...

2007-09-11T16:15:00.000-07:00

**The following is my comment in its entirety that was deleted from the post in question**

(I refuse to loose my religion for the first 2 minutes of my post)

You know, I was really thinking about posting my thoughts about this current situation but hesitated and after some thought decided that it would be best to deal with this outside of this lil website. However, someone has decided to take the bedraggled laundry out to wash it. Hence I'm forced to add some detergent, after which I refuse to speak on this bull shit again!

Yes I did state that I wanted a laptop and yes because your profession involves computers, I asked for your opinion about which one would be best for me. It did not take us 2 days to decide on a machine, it took ONE! However, if you would like to give it TWO or more to increase the BURDEN you felt, fine. I was prepared to apply for credit to purchase said laptop on my own but you offered to use your Dell card because you already had an account. Reluctantly I agreed and did thank you and was grateful. Being responsible, I signed a promisary note and have been keeping as you know track and recepts of the payments I've made to you. Your fucking problem (sorry I tried) is that you don't seem to grasp the concept of a fucking MONEY ORDER!!! As I've explained to you it is a CASH NOTE! If I'm walking down the street and it falls out my pocket and someone picks it up, they can easily write their name on it and take it to a bank, or to a supermarket, or to a 7 eleven (if they accept money orders) and receive CASH IN HAND!!! WHY IS IT THAT YOU DEPOSIT A FUCKING MONEY ORDER INTO YOUR BANK ACCOUNT TO CLEAR IS STILL BEYOND ME! As I told you before when you said you brought it to the teller and she told you that it takes 24 hours to clear, you should promptly request an audience with her Supervisor and then the Branch Manager if that fucker is an idiot too! The reason I did not bring the MONEY ORDER to the party that we went to on Friday, AGAIN, is because I did not want to run the risk of loosing it in transit because as I've said once lost, that's $$$ gone! No going to my bank and saying "Oops" because they won't give a fuck.

Next, I love your time frame for when I brought you the MONEY ORDER but let me inject some FACT into your story. You called me at 12:57 pm and I did say I would bring it to you when I got up. I dropped off the MONEY ORDER at your house at 1:41 pm! LESS THAN A HOUR AFTER WE SPOKE! When I spoke to you at 12:57 pm, you ended the conversation by saying "Ok well I'll be here." So when I showed up LESS THAN AN HOUR LATER to drop off the Money Order, you got mad because I didn't call and stated "What if I weren't here? What if I had left?" Well since it had been less than a hour after I had spoken to you, if you were going to step out, would you not call knowing that you told someone you were gonna be home? Either way, I was not mad because it was a non issue to me. It didn't become a fucking issue until YOU called me 4 minutes at 1:45 bitching as to why I didn't CALL YOU to let you know I was coming. During said conversation where you asked me why do I wait til 3 days before it's due to give you the MONEY ORDER (Imma keep putting that in caps hoping it will stick!) and in your words "You just don't care because it's not your credit!" to which I replied "I would never do anything to fuck up your credit because I know how important credit is."

(Transcript)

BnM- Have you ever had to pay a late payment due to when I've given you the MONEY ORDER?

JB- That's not the point.

BnM- Again, have you ever had to pay a late payment due to when I've given you the MONEY ORDER?

JB- That's not the point BnM

BnM- AGAIN, HAVE YOU EVER HAD TO PAY A LATE PAYMENT JB?

JB- Almost.

BnM- Almost doesn't count. HAVE YOU EVER HAD TO PAY A FUCKING LATE PAYMENT DUE TO WHEN I'VE GIVEN YOU THE MONEY ORDER?

JB- No.

BnM- So what the FUCK is your problem?!

Never the less, at the end of that conversation, I said to you "JB, fine. I will make sure that like rent, on the first of every month until the bill is paid, you will have said MONEY ORDER in your hand. Will that be satisfactory to you?" You said "Yes" and I hung up. Issue resolved.

To me the issue was resolved. When we went out to dinner with our friends you brought it up there and I told you there was nothing to talk about because we resolved it. Two of our friends wanted to know what the problem was and why you were mad at me. I told them because they are...our friends. The night went on...

It wasn't an issue again until your email to my job said "Morning. How are you?" and then in the next paragraph decided that you wanted to rehash the past that had already been resolved. Normally I would not entertain such foolishness but because YOU say that I am 'dismissive' to you and your feelings, I decided to hear you out and to calmly go back and forth with you about an issue that AGAIN had been resolved 2 days prior. The conversation started at 11 when you arrived at work and after 2.5 hours of going back and forth with you not only talking about this issue, but you taking little pot shots at me saying "This is why you don't have friends" and "I hope Lil Dred" (dude I'm dating) "can deal with you" and "hopefully this one will last", my patience had petered after you ended an email with "Make sure you have the money to me early, UNDERSTAND." I am not your fucking child and I do not wish to go back and forth with this childish shit! Unless you have something else to discuss, I WILL NOT engage in ANY conversation concerning this matter PERIOD! And after two and a half hours of going back and forth with you, you ended the convo with "Yes. Dismiss me like you always do!" calling me stubborn and 'pigheaded'. Cool.

I am not nor have I abused you nor your credit as your reference to your Aunt would suggest! I pay the bill and on time (hence no late payments). As I've stated before, you have a personal problem that you need to deal with. I take issue with the fact that you would use this venue to spin your lil sob story. It was a cute read. The issue is closed for me.

The MONEY ORDER will be given to you on the 1st of every month.

GOOD NIGHT!

~Damnit

LoL... I Love It!!!

2007-09-11T09:15:00.000-07:00

Hmmmmmmmmmm... It would seem that a comment I left on a certain page has been removed by it's administrator... Unfortunate, however it was not unexpected. The truth hurts.

I have saved said comment and will post it on my own blog later this evening for those interested to read.

Jay- in response to your comment, a date of repayment was set up for a year (12 months) of the purchase date stated on the promissary not signed by me and JB. No this note did not state the exact date each month. That was an error. Also, I have money order recepts showing the dates of these Money Orders remitted to JB which will show that they were not all '2-3 days' before the due date. In fact the Money orders are remitted to JB on the 8th which is when he received August 07' and Sept 07'. This can be proven by bank statements and recepts

It was not my intention as I stated in my comment to his blog to post about this or bring friends into it because the issue had been handled. However, a certain individual chooses to air dirty laundry so it is what it is.

Post is forthcoming...

Blast from the Past!

2007-09-04T20:17:00.000-07:00

The following is a post that I did June 9th of 2006 which is posted on my live journal blog. Just some thoughts I had floating around at the time. Toss it around in ya heads and see what ya'll think...

Nu Beta Alpha - The Self Pledging of my People

Morning LJ. Man it's been a couple months but once again I have been inspired to crawl out of bed in the early hours of the morning to have a lil talk. As always our conversations are a result of something I've experienced in life or recently...this time is no different, except the catalyst for this entry is the dream I've just awaken from.

See I don't know wheither you're familiar with fraternity life LJ. Yea it's all fun and games, mostly business once you're out of school...the pledging. Who was "made" right and who "skated". You gotta love it. LoL don't laugh LJ it's a big deal na mean. I've been fortunate (or unfortunate depending on the day of the week...) enough to have been on both sides of the "made" argument. But interestingly enough, I found that my experiences w/in my own frat closely parallel's my experiences as a young black man growing up in this great country which brings me to this hypothesis: We as African Americans pledge each other each and every day.

I was having a political conversation with one of my roommates some time ago which somehow ventured off into our own personal experiences growing up. Who's experience was easier, what we went thru and so forth. And in the heat of battle (as I affectionately call all my debates), I made the comparison of the Black American's Experience to one big Fraternity. See, if your parents worked hard, did the right thing, got an education and did right by their offspring, well their children would be considered to have had a 'silver spoon' (or bronze in my case...lol). If your parents went thru some kind of adversity perceived to be greater than the next individual, then they are more real. It goes towards this question in Fraternity lingo of being 'Made' or 'Skate'n'. See if you're 'MADE', that means you pledged HARD LJ. You been thru some shyt, you know ya shyt! But if you 'Skated', you ain't been thru shyt...paid a couple dollars to wear the letters. You might say Hmmmmmmmm.

LJ, I propose we give this black American fraternal experience a rightful name since the simularities are so stark. Nu Beta Alpha. Here I'll break it down as such. See our ancestors were brought to this country and called Nigger's. Forced into servitude for hundreds of years. Back then, everybody was 'made' right! Well except for the house negro but to an extent they were made as well. In the early 1900's we came into our own and became more than niggers and negros...we became Black. A state of awareness of self; of the lies that were being taught by our former slave masters and the truth that could be extracted from their behavior towards us. Currently we are (or strive to be) African Americans. No longer (to an extent) succeptable to the lies and corruption of those that onece oppressed us in the past. The transition thru these stages has been long.

What I find interesting about Nu Beta Alpha is that we have taken control of the organization and turned it on ourselves. Kinda like kids/young adults running around affectionately calling each other 'niggas'. For those of us that are striving to be better than our ancestors, to do exceedingly well, and in turn succeed...well somehow it's a fluke or we had it easy. Even if our past is littered with trials and tribulations, once we've overcome those, it's like we were never 'MADE' right. Somehow that 'MADE' status is lost or striken from us by those who have not MADE it yet. Again this is self inflicted now days because I personally believe that for all the grief and strife we put on each other about what the 'white man does', they honestly don't pay us any mind. They are more inclined to let us dismantle and destroy our own communities. Have we...has Nu Beta Alpha become so strong and prevalent in our community that we are actually doing what they have wanted to do over the century's but were unable to do? Nu Beta Alpha has been alive and strong much longer than any of the Divine Nine (especially the Iota's...ewwwwwww lol) who are just beginning to celebrate their centennial. Do we as a people continue to use our fraternity as a means to divide and conquor ourselves for eternity or a means to build each other up and make ourselves stronger? I don't know the answer to that LJ. Even within my own fraternity, the animosity between those who were 'MADE' and those who 'Skated' is so deep, it's hard to fathem how the organization has survived this long. A songwritter once said "I've come this far by faith! And it is faith that will lead me on!" So hence, my heart tells me that faith in my people will continue to lead all of us to a better place. I guess only time will tell LJ. Until next time... ~1~

Revelation...

2007-08-24T20:10:00.000-07:00

The door was swung open. The conversation began so simple. We left work... Walked...talked... Boyz passed by (and it seems like everytime I'm with this chick I always see the cutest boyz!). (Excuse the pause but I just finished pleasuring my man...lol)...

Ok, enough of the pleasentries...I finially did it. I've been talking about it for weeks and today on the 24th of August 2007 I finally told my down ass coworker that I get down. How did she take it you ask? Well great actually. How did it happen you may ask? Well I didn't really know what to say. I mean she had taken me thru the intricacies of her dull sexual str8 existence and in a moment of pause I did what any other DL (closeted) dude would do... I sent her a text message. LMAO. Simply put "I wanna tell you something. N don't be all loud Bitch. I'm Bisexual." were my words. I mean I felt she'd be more receptive to that than me saying I'm all out gay. But am I all out gay (Forget the gay sex I just had. That's for another post...lol)? Anywho, she took it very well. She was the fag hag that I'd envisioned her to be. Of course (That's two words btw...) the questions ensued. "What, when, where, how, why?" I answered them in true ~Damnit fashion... "Yes. Now. Everywhere Easily, Because I can. " LoL (As ma nikka coughs in the background... I told him to get under the covers...lol). I honestly don't mind the questions cause I'm well equipted to answer any question posed to me. All n all, it went well. She will be my lil fag hag (no I'm not a fag but nothing else fits...lol)

Interestingly enough, I think she is my antonym. Her attitudinal disposition isn't congruent to mines. She's a liberal democrat (like ma dude), however, a very passionate and driven soul. In other words 'intrigiung'...just my flavor. She wants to have a baby...so do I. Complicated as it may be (No not sexually) I think down the road we may broach that subject but for now I think she's gotten enough info. Anyone that knows me knows that I give you just enough n no more... Shade is I began this summer with the mission of gaining a lesbien friend. A failed proposition but I've seemed to aquired an accepting str8 counterpart. I love her...she is my friend (Now I sound like Tyson...LMAO). In any case, who knows. I may be having a baby! Who want's to be the God Father? LoL.

My baby coughs and I must comfort him... I'll holla.

In my Lifetime...

~Damnit!

Fire On The Island!

2007-08-12T00:34:00.000-07:00

Early morning folks! So yea today me and my boyz (the ones that weren't scared of the sun) went to Fire Island and had a fantastic time! The dudes were wearing what they wear. The females were showing their tits. It was lovely. I flirted a bit. Ok I flirted alot! LMAO. And my ego was stroked by this dude that came up to all of us (it was 9 of us) and said "Are any of these dudes your bf?" to which I answered no. Then he said "Ok kool. Can I take a picture with you?" So we took a picture. Yea he was cute so I ain't mind, however, he was no where as sexy as my baby. I wish he was there with me today. Imma see him later today and I truly miss him. This is the first time we have not seen each other for a whole weekend since we've been talking and although I was a lil excited to be 'free', I realize that I'd rather be shackled for part of the weekend than to not see him at all for a whole weeked!!! It's all good tho. *Sing'n* It's so good...love'n somebody, when somebody loves you back! LoL.

Well this is a short post but it's mad late/early and I need to migrate towards my plush full side Sealy Poster Peadic (if that's how you spell it...lol). 1 hUneT

~Damnit

Genesis: So Amazing!

2007-08-06T16:42:00.000-07:00

No ceremony. No introductions. My personality and the patterns of my thoughts will surface thru my forthcoming entries. Drawing on nothing else but spontanious thought, I will scribe these words to this lil blog thingy and in true 'Damnit' fashion, let those that read it take it or leave it. Having said that, I present to you...Genesis!

Friends... Ya know, I'm a very socialble person but I've never had many people whom I were 'friends' with. For those that know me, know that I'm hardly reserved and seldom do I have a problem expressing my affection or disdain towards you. For this reason I have had many people who didn't care for me AT ALL. Conversely, I have people who find my cander refreshing and value my opion...even if they are on the receiving end of my comments. Undoubtibly my personality and temperment scare many away, however, for those brave souls who remain intrigued find that beneathe this hard shell lies a caring and real individual. It is those few, those proud, those kool ass individuals whom I call friends.

Love... Love is interesting to me. I can tell you want my definition of love is. I can see it, feel it, taste it, envision what it should and could be having not truely been encapsulated by it's warmth and tranquility. I am currently dating someone and things are going good. I'm not one of these people that get all consumed in someone not realizing their flaws and yes, he has his as I have mines. But the wonderful thing about taking the time to get to know someone is that you learn more about those flaws...idiosyncrasies if you will. I've made numerous hasty decisions in the past with respects to love. Considering I am for all intensive purposes still single...well talking to someone (does that technically still make me single in a way...? Hmmm...probably not. Another thought for another blog...), I would say that I wish to not revisit those failed love experiences. So for my friends who will undoubtably read this lil entry if for no other reason but curiosity, for the 12th time NO WE ARE NOT OFFICIAL YET!!! LoL. When it happens, we will direct ya'll to our registry and ya'll can buy us gifts. LoL.

Alcohol... Hmmmmm how to approach this one...? Wait a minute, I'm Damnit! I'll approach it the good ol "Damnit" way. I drink and I like it! There I said it! LoL. Naw but on the real, people have expressed in their own subtle way that I drink a lot to which I respond "Imma social drinker. I just happen to be more social then everyone else." Ya know, when I was younger, I was the worst. Drinking, throwing up all over the place, just a mess. One thing I've learned is that the purpose of drinking is not to get drunk cause you miss out on things. To that end, drinking is sort of like a pastime to me that I engage in responsibly. Now I won't sit here and say that there haven't been those times where I may have had one too many, however, it can be said that I always have my wits about me. But it's all good. I'm quitting soon! LoL.

Well I believe that's all for now. I will try to be more assiduous in updating this lil blog thing. I think my goal with this thing is to allow peeps to see the other side of my personality that is normally not on display during the social gatherings. This is the dawn of a new era on this blog. I've arrived and I'm SOOOOOOOOOO Amazing!

Cheers,

Damnit!